人生嘛。。

人生。。。
像一场戏。。
这是每个人说的话。。
但我不赞同。。
因为。。
戏是假的。。
而人生。。
是现实和残酷的！！！

也许。。
有些人会反对我这么说。。
但是。。
我说的是真的。。
因为。。
我的人生就是这样。。
永远都是现实以及残酷。。

还有四天就要拿成绩。。
我不是没有信心。。
只是。。
我怕现实并不是我想象的那样。。
我怕又再失败。。
如果我再失败。。
我怕我爬不起来。。

我妈。。
一直问我以后要干嘛。。
我怎样回答你啊。。
我想要读音乐你反对。。
如果我告诉你我要读大众传播媒体。。
你不是发疯？？

我决定了。。
我选择那科系是因为它跟音乐很相识。。
至少。。
我不会太伤心。。
打算选择拉曼学院。。
这样好吗？？

一旦选择了这条路。。
我不能放弃。。
千万不能。。

加油啊！

热

天气好热哦!!
突然想念工作。。
因为可以吹冷气。。
哈哈==
每晚都很难睡觉
的确。。
家里有冷气就好。。

但我也很想他啦。。
虽然只是一个星期没见面。。
但我希望。。
每天能够和他在一起。。

天啊。。嗨。。

迷路

又迷路了。。
该走这条还是那条。。
曾经有三条。。
可是。。
那条被他们给毁掉了。。
走不下去。。
我放弃了。。
现在。。
心好空。。
好像有东西消失了。。
十年多了叻。。
现在放弃。。
好舍不得。。
他们理解我的心情吗？？

剩下两条。。
第一条。。
我想要。。
可是要到那里实现它呢？？

第二条。。
我不想要。。
因为那不是我的选择。。
要怎么办呢？？

我每天都在想。。
一天到晚在想。。
很烦。。
真得很烦。。
可是。。
决定要快点做。。
因为。。
时间不多了。。
成绩大概下星期就要出了。。

曾经有个朋友。。
可以跟他诉苦。。
现在。。只能对着电脑打字诉苦。。
日子就这样过了三个月。。
他留下来的痕迹。。
永远都留在我心中。。

但我有他。。
所以我并不怕。。
我相信他。。
因为他是重要的人。。

Life in a mess!!!!!

First...i failed my exam and I have to stop YAMAHA...I dont want to stop..love music very much..i really miss them...my friends especialy..I have been 10 years there..U want me to leave..very hard....
Second...I dunno when will my SPM results is coming out..and i am very anxious about it because I dunno where will I going to be sent to....
Third...I am resigning my job...damn it...now have to think what am i going to do next..which makes me want to go mad..because i get a job so i wont be day dreaming bout all these problems....just running away..but i stil have to face it..NOW!!!!
Forth...both my parents seems like they are having different opinions....father dont mind i study mass com but hopes i take up journalism(his path once....but i want broadcasting)...and i think my mother wants me to study science subject like pharmacy or etc....(not my type, even though i am a science student)...and both of them want me to enter local u..its not that i hate them and even though they are among the top in the world...i dont see any future there in my head...i mean for myself..
Fifth..boyfriend issues....his mother knows about our relationship..and she is right...there is still a long road to go...concentrate in your studies...even becoming 'friends'..but dont do wrong things..coz..not good for both families.......i am happy with him...seems like i cant live without him...coz i will feel lonely....I know its not a right time to get into a relationship...but i want to take it slow and steady at the same time..i also dont want to lose him....its God will whether this is our destiny to be together...I trust Him that one day..i will meet my half apple..no matter i met him already or not..

Chinese New Year

wahaha..chinese new year...everyday also eat T.T..i gain weight le la...scary......i need to exercise d..haha
yesterday i followed my family back to my mother hometown(tangkak,johor) to pray grandma and see my aunt..haiz.....my uncle kena mild stroke..he aledi 60 stg...got diabetes some more...see him i also ke lian him..coz his sis also dun want go back see him..
but my big aunt more worse le....now ..because of diabetes..she blind d... cant walk...cant eat by herself..need ppl to help her....i feel sad for her..now she have to wash her kidney everyweek also ....haiz....i am very scared she wont hold on that long..really scared i will loose another family member..but wat choice i have...ppl still will leave this place one day..it is the circle of life...right??
i have been thinking seriously these days whether to stop my music or not..coz i failed my exam for the 4th time...my cousin suggest i go study business management..hmm.....
hehe..yesterday i ate strawberry..but this type different o..big big de..and sweet some more..@@
my chloe...haha..sometime see her like very ke lian...coz..like nobody bother her like that...haha..but she quite smart o..hehe..can climb gate d..dunno how...from back can climb until infront...haha....cute chloe..love her very much....and also...yean chee....hmm..i dunno y..feels like i am not ready yet.............T.T

what is happening???

Yesterday i made my family quarrel again..ya..it is always my fault.....but i couldnt understand why he always choose to avoid it every time..always choose a solution that will only cause more anger in my heart...he thinks everything must use violence....even though it will not solve anything at all..
today i am going late to work..probably will work till midnight....so tired....last saturaday and sunday i was sitting at box 6...but i need to say something...to customers:"there are no emergency lanes ok???if have reservations..pls go to gold class....and pls dunn cut Q....and box 6 or box 1 is not any information counter also..stay in line and wait for your turn....." ==
my head keep spinning since yesterday morning..dunno y...???having weird dreams lately too..even though ppl said that dreams are nothing..but since i was a kid..i dream almost everyday..and sometime..i can even remember it....that sucks...and makes me tired....
i hope when in the future..i wont have a family which only sees money as a factor to stay together....i dun want a family that is left with only responsibility but no love at all.....money is important..but not as important as support and love to our love ones..right???

MY life......

What is my life going to be if I give up my dreams now and follow what my parents say???Will it turn up right....????
我只是想完成我的音乐梦想。。。。。我知道我并不特别。。。。没有像别人（周董，方文山）那么特别。。但是。。我爱音乐。。。那还不够吗？？？音乐。。。它。。。能给大家快乐。。。悲伤。。。。还有千多种的心情。。。对吗？？？
你。。当初。。。。是你要我学音乐的。。有一次。。我很想放弃。。。我还跟你们吵架了。。。你们还是逼我去。。。我听了。。我去。。。现在。。我要学更多有关音乐的东西。。你却说要我越早完成越好。。。。你到底要我怎样。。。如果你那么么不想要我爱上音乐。。。。那为什么当初带我去学。。。我在想。。。你未必太自私了一点啊？？为了他还有你自己退休以后的钱。。竟然要我放弃音乐？？？你那么不相信我的实力吗？？？你为什么总是爱把我跟别人拿来比啊？？？我是你女儿。。。。你要相信我！！！而且。。你真的有时伤了我的心。。。竟然说你们一分钱也不想出让我读大学。。。。。你们知道。。。。你这样说。。。让我想。。你们是没有在自持我的。。。。为什么你们要这样啊？？？